June 28, 2008

wanna buy a watch?


I am often asked, “So who does most of the cooking?’
An innocent question really.
“We both do.” I generally answer.

There are deeper questions, but for the most part, they aren’t asked. Newly married you are offered the convenience of learning…and to some degree distance. Those married remember the early months, and those unmarried can’t really understand.

Do you endure or enjoy? Is it one or the other, somewhere in between, or a marvelous mix? Can you understand that indescribable entrance of God, when invited, into your relationships? What does it look like as you allow Him entrance into those parts of your life you ‘had a handle on’ (hey…I’m feelin’ more mature this decade).

Communication. How long have you been in conversation with your best of friends? I can only assume you’ve learned one another…or at least what you’ve chose to expose. The timing and entrance into those unique qualities take time, effort and openness. And they are simply wonderful places to see Jesus show up and laugh. I love my wife dearly, and learning to be the husband I was made to be, with and for her, is a pleasure I never knew existed.

So do we endure one another’s differences as we force our perceptions and expectation upon each other? No. Do we come to enjoy the covenant of marriage, and allow for His work in both of each other and us? Yes. Is it difficult? Not ‘if’, but rather ‘when’…the loss of the choices of a single life in the privileged western world…that will allow you to see love and relationship in a different way. Not to simply endure, but to enjoy.

Have you ever had an old watch? One you’ve enjoyed for years on end…and then it began to fail – it still told time, but the watch ‘thought’ the 24 hour day measured 24 hours and 15 minutes. If you were like me, you’d take note, and reset your old friend each morning as you moved through your familiar and regular routine. You (and I) can endure it. But then you are asked for the time, throughout the day, and its important. Do you guess, or do you collect a new watch? Do you gain a growing perspective in the enjoyment of walking together? I think you do.

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